Transcript: Life's Sweet as Eh!
Children walk past lockers in a school hallway.
Text reads “Screen Australia and The Australian Broadcasting Corporation Present. In association with The Australian Children’s Television Foundation and Screen NSW. A Northern Pictures Production.”
Children rap, A NEW DAY DAWNS IN
THE WILD WILD WEST,
WHEN A STATE WILL DISCOVER
WHO WILL BE THE BEST
AND YOU KNOW WHEN THE GOING
GETS TOUGH,
TEAM MAHAKI DIGS DOWN
AND USE THE RIGHT STUFF
A boy with short black hair walks with his hands in his pocket. He wears a navy and grey school jacket and a light blue shirt. Text beneath him reads “Mikey.” A girl with long black hair pulled away from her face wears a white shirt. Text beneath her reads “Salwa.” A boy wears his short brown hair parted on the right. He wears a navy and grey school jacket. Text beneath him reads “Jerry.” A girl wears a grey and navy school jacket over her white shirt. Her dark hair is pulled back into two buns. Text beneath her reads “Prisha.”
Children sing, 'CAUSE IF YOU WANNA
PLAY HANDBALL,
THEN YOU'VE GOTTA GIVE IT
YOUR ALL
A girl wears her long dark brown hair loose over her shoulders. She wears glasses, a yellow jacket, a purple shirt and a purple plaid skirt. Text beneath her says “Tiffany.” A boy and girl with blond hair wear bright green jackets as they dance. Text beneath him reads “Viktor.” Text beneath her reads “Ivanka.”
Children sing, COME ON
'CAUSE IF YOU WANNA PLAY HANDBALL,
YOU'VE GOTTA THINK BIG, NOT SMALL
IF YOU WANNA PLAY HANDBALL,
THEN YOU'VE GOTTA PLAY HARDBALL
Text reads “Created and Written by Guy Edmonds & Matt Zeremes.” “Hardball.” Mikey wears an orange and red striped shirt.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, HEY, EVERYONE.
SWEET AS TO BE BACK, EH?
HEAPS HAS HAPPENED.
FIRST UP, PRISHA'S THE NEWEST
MEMBER OF TEAM MAHAKI.
PS: SHE'S A BBF.
BEST BRO FOREVER, EH?
WE DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER -
WATER BOMBS...
Jerry pops a water balloon.
[Pop, splash]
Mikey says, DOING DANCES.
[Dance music plays]
Salwa, Tiffany, Prisha, Mikey and Jerry dance.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, YOU'RE PROBABLY WONDERING,
"WHY IS TIFF HERE?"
WELL, ME AND TIFF HAVE FINALLY
BECOME BBFS, WHICH IS SWEET AS, EH?
PPS: TIFF FINALLY APOLOGISED TO SALWA.
Tiffany and Salwa stand in a schoolyard.
Tiffany says, SORRY, OKAY?
Salwa says, ACCEPTED, BRO.
Salwa and Tiffany pop open canisters and streamers fly out of them.
[Popping]
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, LEOPARDS CAN CHANGE
THEIR SPOTS. SWEET AS, EH?
IN HANDBALL LAND, SALWA'S HUNG
UP THE HANDBALLS AND PICKED UP
A CLIPBOARD.
Prisha, Salwa and Jerry hold clipboards.
Mikey says, THAT'S RIGHT, JERRY,
SALWA, AND PRISHA ARE ALL
FULL-TIME COACHES, WHICH IS
SWEET AS. SALWA'S STILL A
GUN PLAYER THOUGH, EH?
DADDY'S FINALLY PLAYING FIRST-GRADE
FOOTY, WHICH IS MEAN AS.
Daddy runs into a punching bag.
[Thump]
Mikey says, AUNTIE...
AUNTIE'S STILL AUNTIE,
BUT THAT'S SWEET AS, EH?
[Whirling]
Mikey says, AND, WHAT ELSE? OH!
THERE'S A MEAN AS HANDBALL STATE
TOURNAMENT COMING UP AND
EVERYBODY'S MAD AS ABOUT IT.
A girl with black hair and glasses holds up a sign that reads “Staties Handball Competition.” Three young teens stand on each side.
They hold up their arms and yell, STATIES!
Mikey says, BUT AT STATIES, WE HAVE
TO PLAY DOUBLES HANDBALL.
TEAM MAHAKI TWO POINT OH, SKUXXER
THAN A TRIPLE CHEESE TOASTIE.
GETTING TO STATIES IS GOING TO BE TOUGH.
BUT LUCKY FOR US, WE HAVE THE
BEST COACHES IN THE BIZ.
WHERE'S JERRY?
OH, WAIT, TOTALLY FORGOT.
Three balloons hang on a brick wall behind Jerry.
[Solemn music plays]
Jerry says, I KNOW I'M GOING ALL
THE WAY TO W.A.
BUT DESPITE THE DISTANCE, WHICH
IS IMMENSE, MY HEART WILL BE
FOREVER BOUND TO BLOCK STREET
AND MY BROS AND HANDBALL.
AND ALTHOUGH I'LL BE GONE FOREVER--
Mikey says, YOU'RE GOING FOR A TERM, BRO.
Jerry says, WELL, FOREVER SOUNDS A LOT
MORE DRAMATIC.
ALTHOUGH I'LL BE GOING FOR A
TERM, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT
OUR FRIENDSHIP SHALL ENDURE.
AS THE GREAT MACHINE FROM THE
FUTURE ONCE SAID, "I'LL COME BACK."
Mikey says, I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S
NOT THE LINE, EH, BRO?
Jerry says, PROBABLY, BUT YOU GET
THE GIST. GOODBYE.
Mikey says, GONNA MISS YOU, BRO.
Mikey, Prisha and Salwa hug Jerry. Tiffany waves awkwardly.
Prisha, Mikey and Tiffany pop streamer canisters.
[Popping]
[Squeaking, beeping]
Jerry types on the control panel for his wheelchair. He sighs and holds a solar panel. Mikey looks up at the cloudy sky.
Jerry says, THIS COULD TAKE A WHILE.
A globe spins.
[Whoosh]
Mikey sits at a desk in a classroom.
Mikey says, CONSIDER YOURSELF
UP TO DATE AS.
BACK IN HANDBALL WORLD, WE'VE
GOT TO GET THROUGH ZONE AND
REGIONALS, BUT IF WE WORK AS A
TEAM, WE'VE GOT A REAL SHOT TO
GET TO STATIES.
SO, BASICALLY, LIFE IS SKUXXER
THAN A WHEELBARROW FULL OF
UNICORN POOP.
Ms. Crapper says, CLASS SIX-B, WE HAVE
TWO VERY SPECIAL NEW STUDENTS
JOINING US TODAY.
ORIGINALLY HAILING FROM ALL THE
WAY IN W.A.--
A student says, IT'S NOT EVEN RAINING, MS.
Ms. Crapper explains, HAIL - IT'S WHERE
YOU COME FROM.
The boy asks, THEN, WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST SAY THAT?
Ms. Crapper says, THESE TWO TWIN
SPORTING PRODIGIES REALLY COME
FROM A RUSSIAN PORT TOWN, IN RUSSIA,
FAMOUS FOR ITS RUSSIAN PICKLES,
RUSSIAN BEARS AND RUSSIAN
HANDBALL, WHICH IS JUST LIKE
REGULAR HANDBALL, BUT RUSSIAN.
A VERY WELCOME AND RUSSIAN
ADDITION TO BLOCK STREET...
Ms. Crapper turns on a music player and walks to a classroom door. She opens it and a blond-haired boy and blonde-haired girl walk into the classroom.
[Russian national anthem plays]
[Door opens]
Ms. Crapper continues...IVANKA AND VIKTOR VOLKOV.
[Russian national anthem plays]
Ms. Crapper throws a ball. Ivanka catches it and crushes it in her hand.
[Gasping]
Ms. Crapper asks, CARE TO SAY A FEW WORDS?
Viktor says, THANK YOU, MS. CRAPPER.
LOOK, OUR GRANDPARENTS WERE BORN
IN RUSSIA, BUT WE'VE ALWAYS
LIVED ALL THE WAY IN W.A.
SO, NOT REALLY RUSSIAN.
BUT WE LOVE SPORT, BUT WE DON'T
LIKE PICKLES, AND NEITHER OF US
HAVE SEEN A BEAR.
Ivanka interupts, EXCEPT AT THE ZOO.
Viktor agrees, EXCEPT AT THE ZOO.
Ivanka says, CAN'T WAIT TO CRUSH YOU ALL
IN HANDBALL AND RULE THE QUAD BY
THE END OF THE DAY.
Salwa says,I DON'T KNOW.
[Bell rings]
[Upbeat music plays]
Salwa throws a ball at a circle on a wall. She misses.
Viktor and Ivanka skip.
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey asks, WHO DOES CARDIO AT RECESS?
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
Salwa sits between Mikey and Prisha.
Salwa says, JUST...NOWHERE.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey says, THEY'VE BEEN SKIPPING FOR
FIFTEEN MINUTES, NON-STOP.
Prisha says, WE SHOULD TALK TO THEM,
SUSS OUT THE COMPETITION.
Tiffany, Mikey, Salwa and Prisha approach Ivanka and Viktor.
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey says, HEY, BROS, JUST WANTED
TO SAY HI, EH?
Viktor skips as he says, MIKEY MAHAKI,
TIFFANY STEELE-STONE, SALWA ZARA
AND PRISHA PAPENSNOOZEN.
Prisha says, PAPENHUYZEN.
Ivanka says, AND LET'S NOT FORGET
YOUR NUMBER ONE COACH, JERRY
LOUIS STEVENSON.
Viktor says, WHO'S SWAPPED SCHOOLS
WITH US FOR THE TERM, YES?
Mikey says, RESEARCHED AS.
Ivanka says, PEOPLE IN THIS SCHOOL
PLAY HANDBALL LIKE BABY PUPPIES.
Salwa says, PUPPIES ARE BABIES, BRO.
Viktor says, YOU PRESENT NO THREAT TO US.
Tiffany asks, OVERCONFIDENT MUCH?
Ivanka says, YOU VS US, LUNCH.
WINNER RULES THE QUAD.
Prisha says, SORRY, GANG, BUT
TEAM MAHAKI RULE THE QUAD
AROUND HERE. SO, YEAH, YEAH.
Viktor says, PROVE IT.
AT LUNCH, WE BATTLE.
A boy with short hair says, LUNCH BATTLE!
[Dramatic music plays]
Viktor and Ivanka each balance a yellow handball on a knee as they hold handballs in each hand. They bounce the balls in their hands on the ground.
[Thump]
Jerry appears on a tablet.
Jerry says, I'LL FIND OUT WHAT I CAN
ABOUT THEM FROM HERE.
BOUND TO BE BREADCRUMBS
Mikey says, YEAH, WE'LL DO THE SAME.
Jerry says, I IMAGINE THEY'LL BE
FORMIDABLE OPPONENTS.
THIS SCHOOL IS QUITE LITERALLY
A HANDBALL PALACE.
Salwa says, AND IF THEIR HANDBALL'S
HALF AS INTENSE AS THEM,
WE'RE IN A TOUGHER BATTLE
THAN WHEN MY COUSIN WON
HIS JUNIOR JU-JITSU TOURNAMENT.
Mikey says, YEAH, IT'S JUST A CHALLENGE.
WE'RE ALWAYS DOWN FOR A
CHALLENGE, RIGHT?
Salwa, Tiffany and Prisha say, RIGHT.
[Balls bounce]
Prisha asks, DO YOU THINK HE GOT MY NAME
WRONG ON PURPOSE? MOVING RIGHT ALONG.
[Balls bounce]
[Dramatic music plays]
Kevin says, I DON'T CARE ABOUT
YOUR DUMB LUNCH BATTLE.
I DIDN'T WANT TO COACH YOU AFTER
MY BABY-BRO AND MY PARENTS WENT
ALL THE WAY TO W.A., WHICH I ALSO
DON'T CARE ABOUT.
[Chiming]
Prisha says, KEVIN, I'M SORRY YOU'RE UPSET
I GOT THE COACHING GIG, AND I'M
SORRY YOU FEEL ABANDONED BY
YOUR FAMILY.
Prisha says, I'M NOT UPSET; YOU'RE UPSET.
[Chiming]
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH, EXCEPT I'M NOT
AND IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS YOU ARE.
Kevin says, WELL, WHATEVER. SO, WHAT?
YOU WANT ME TO ACCESS
THE VOVO'S SPORTING RECORDS?
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, VOLKOVS.
Kevin says, YOU WANT ME TO ACCESS THE
VOLBROM'S SPORTING RECORDS--
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, VOLKOVS.
Kevin says, --SEE IF THERE'S ANY RESEARCH
AND THEN PASS ON SAID RESEARCH
TO YOU SO THAT YOU DON'T GET AN
ALL-TIME BUTT KICK?
[Chiming]
Prisha says, SO, LONG AS IT'S BTB, IT'S
OKAY WITH ME.
Mikey explains, "BY THE BOOK."
IT'S KIND OF HER THING.
Kevin says, I'D LOVE TO HELP.
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, REALLY?
Salwa and Prish say, AWESOME, THANKS.
Mikey says, COOL.
[Chime]
Kevin says, EXCEPT THE SYSTEM'S DOWN.
NOW, MAKE LIKE ELVIS AND GET OUT
OF HERE, THE WAY YOU CAME IN.
LEAVE! SCRAM!
[Energetic music plays]
Ms. Crapper glances up from writing. She looks around the classroom, then goes back to her work.
Salwa says, PSST, GUYS.
WHAT ABOUT THAT VOLKOV FOLDER
MS. WAS LOOKING IN? DO YOU RECKON
THERE'S ANYTHING IN THERE?
Tiffany says, MAYBE, BUT EVERY SINGLE
ATHLETE I KNOW HAS A SUPER
STRICT DIET.
Salwa says, SO?
Tiffany says, SO, MAYBE THE VOLKOVS HAVE
GOT SOME SUPER FOOD THAT MAKES
THEM SUPER AWESOME?
Mikey says, WHOLEMEAL TOAST?
Tiffany says, MAYBE.
Prisha says, CHIA TORTILLA?
Tiffany says, MAYBE.
Salwa says, POMEGRANATE MOLASSES?
Tiffany says, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS,
BUT MAYBE.
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH.
MAYBE WE SPLIT UP.
MIKEY, TIFF, YOU FIND A WAY TO
GET OUT OF CLASS, LEGALLY.
FIND THAT FOLDER AND CHECK THEIR
LUNCH BOXES.
BUT JUST LOOK, DON'T TAKE.
NO HARM IN THAT... I THINK.
IS THERE?
Salwa says, NO.
PLEASE RELAX.
WHAT ABOUT US?
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?
Prisha say, WE STAKE OUT VIKTOR.
Salwa says, ONLY VIKTOR?
Prisha says, AND IVANKA.
WE STAKE OUT VIKTOR AND IVANKA.
Mikey says, NICE THINKING, P.,
OPERATION MAHAKI RESEARCH
TASK IS A GO.
Tiffany puts up her hand.
Ms. Crapper says, YES?
Tiffany says, MS, I LEFT MY STUDY BOOK
IN THE QUAD. CAN I GO GET IT?
Ms. Crapper says, TAKE A BUDDY.
Mikey says, WE'RE MOVING.
Mikey moves a chair.
[Thump]
Viktor and Ivanka trade papers.
[Rustle of paper]
[Door opens]
Mikey says, YOU GET THE LUNCH,
I'LL GET THE FOLDERS.
Tiffany says, GOT IT.
[Mikey inhales and exhales sharply]
Tiffany kneels by a backpack. She opens a lunch box and looks inside. She shuts it and puts it back.
[Clanking]
Viktor moves his shoulder and arm.
[Electronic whirring]
Salwa asks, WHAT IS HE DOING?
Prisha says, NO I-DE-A.
[Electronic whirring]
Viktor throws a handball to Ivanka. She throws it at a poster. It bounces off of a clock and whizzes past Mustafa’s face. The ball lands in a garbage basket.
Mustafa says, WHOA!
Ms. Crapper says, MUSTAFA, SILENCE!
Tiffany gives a thumbs up.
Mikey says, LET'S GO.
A boy and girl sing, YOU KNOW THAT
WE'RE UNBEATABLE
IT'S FAR FROM INCON--
A girl says, OH, HEY, GUYS.
Mikey and Tiffany say, HEY.
Mikey asks, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?
The boy says, WE'RE WRITING A
TOP-SECRET MUSICAL.
IT'S CALLED HANDBALL: THE
MUSICAL. WE'RE HOPING TO
PREMIERE IT AT STATIES.
Tiffany says, SOUNDS PRETTY
TOP SECRET, OKAY.
The girl says, YEAH, WE'VE ALREADY SAID TOO
MUCH, BUT IT'S GONNA BE AMAZE.
The boy sings, AMAZING
Mikey says, WELL, WE'RE ON A
TOP-SECRET MISSION, AS WELL.
IT'S ALSO AMAZE BECAUSE I DON'T
KNOW WHERE TO GO NEXT.
The boy says, OKAY, WELL, THERE'S A WHOLE
THING GOING ON THERE, BUT, TIFF,
THERE'S A PART FOR YOU IF YOU
WANT TO GET THE BAND BACK TOGETHER?
Tiffany says, WE SHOULD GET GOING.
The boy says, YEAH, IT'S FINE.
I MEAN, THERE'S LOTS OF OTHER
PEOPLE INTERESTED IN THE ROLE.
The girl says, YEAH, LIKE HIS MUM.
The boy says, LIKE MY MUM.
Tiffany says, COOL.
WHAT'S THIS?
Mikey says, IT'S YOUR BOOK.
SO, CRAPPER DOESN'T ASK
ANY QUESTIONS.
Tiffany says, OH, RIGHT, MY ALIBI.
YEAH, THANKS, MIKEY, OKAY.
Mikey says, GOT YOUR BACK, BRO.
Mikey and Tiffany walk back to their desks.
Prisha asks, WHERE WE AT, GANG?
Mikey says, I GOT MS.'S FOLDER
AND IT WAS FULL OF...
[Dramatic music]
Flashback: A folder opens. Inside is a schedule of “Bullfrog Homegames.”
Salway says, BULLFROGS? ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Prisha asks, TIFF?
Tiffany says, SO, I GOT TO THEIR LUNCH
BOXES AND IT WAS LOADED WITH...
Tiffany opens a lunchbox. Inside is a unicorn-shaped cookie.
[Whinnying]
Prisha asks, EVEN VIKTOR'S?
Tiffany says, EVERY ONE, CUT
LIKE A UNICORN.
Prisha says, OH, MY GOSH, SO CUTE.
Mikey says, UNLESS YOU GUYS GOT
SOMETHING, WE'VE GOT NOTHING.
Salwa says, WELL, THEY KNOCKED A BALL ALL
OVER THE ROOM AND IT LANDED IN A BIN.
Prisha says, OFF SIX REBOUNDS.
VIKTOR'S SHOT DESIGN IS OFF THE CHARTS.
Mikey says, SIX REBOUNDS, FOR REAL?
Mikey says, YEAH, YEAH.
I DID NOTICE ONE THING, THOUGH.
THEY'RE BOTH AMBIDEXTROUS.
Mikey says, AMBI-WHO-STROUS?
Salwa explains, THEY CAN USE BOTH
HANDS AS GOOD AS EACH OTHER.
Prisha says, THIS MORNING, IVANKA CAUGHT
THE BALL WITH HER LEFT HAND, BUT
WHILE YOU WERE GONE, SHE CAUGHT
IT WITH HER RIGHT.
Mikey says, SKUX DISCOVERY, BROS.
BUT YOU SAID BOTH OF...
OH, I BET HE DOES HIS HOMEWORK
REALLY QUICK.
Tiffany says, SO, HOW'S THIS HELPING?
Prisha says, AS DOUBLES PLAYERS,
YOU STICK TO ONE SIDE OF THE COURT,
DEPENDING ON YOUR DOMINANT
HAND, YEAH?
THE VOLKOVS CAN PLAY ANY SIDE,
ANY TIME, ANY HAND.
Salwa says, WHAT?
[Bell rings]
Mikey says, JERRY MOMENT.
Prisha holds a cellphone. Jerry appears on it.
Jerry says, SO, I KNOW YOU'RE ABOUT TO
GO INTO BATTLE, BUT I WATCHED THIS
COACHING AMA LAST NIGHT, AND
THE GENTLEMAN SAID, "ALONE,
YOU'RE WEAK; TOGETHER YOU'RE--
Salwa says, TOGETHER, YOU'RE STRONG.
Mikey says, SKUX ADVICE.
Jerry says, OKAY THEN, JERRY OUT.
Prisha says, OKAY, SO, MIKEY, YOU GOT
POWER - STAY ON THE BASELINE.
TIFF, YOU'VE GOT SPEED, SO GO UP
FRONT. LET'S GO.
[Intense music plays as Viktor and Ivanka carry cases. They put them down.
[Thunk]
Students sit on benches as Mikey and Tiffany step into their quad squares.
A boy with short black hair announces, OKAY,
HAPPY HANDBALLERS. TIME FOR FUN TIME.
FIRST TO THREE. DOUBLES DOWNTOWN.
FOLLOW THE RULES AND LOVE THE
RULES. COOL TIMES?
Ivanka says, WE'RE GONNA CRUSH YOU.
Tiffany says, NOT IF WE CRUSH
YOU FIRST, OKAY?
Viktor says, WE'RE UNCRUSHABLE.
Mikey says, LIKE AN ALUMINIUM CAN FULL OF
SUGARY FLAVOURED BUBBLE WATER.
Ivanka crushes a can and throws it.
[Crushing, clank]
Mikey says, YOU KNOW
HOW THEY SAY ACTIONS
SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS?
I CAN SEE WHY, EH?
The announcer says, BEGIN TIME!
[Honk]
[Dramatic music plays, ball bounces, whoosh]
A ball flies between Mikey and Tiffany.
[Honk, cheering]
Mikey says, HOLY-LOOLIE.
WE'LL GET THEM NEXT POINT, EH?
[Honk, whoosh]
Ivanka serves a ball and it flies between Mikey and Tiffany.
Salwa says, TIME OUT, TIME OUT.
Prisha says, THEY'RE PLAYING A LOW GAME.
Salwa says, YEAH.
THEY'RE DRAGGING SICK AS.
DROP YOUR CENTRES OF GRAVITIES.
Prisha says, LOVING THE TECH TALK.
Salwa says, BIOLOGY'S MY
FAVOURITE SUBJECT.
AND OI, HIT THE BALL HIGH.
THAT'LL SMASH THEIR LOW GAME.
Announcer says, BEGIN TIME.
[Honk, dramatic music plays]
Mikey serves the ball.
[Ball bounces]
Ivanka hits a ball between Mikey and Tiffany. They watch it pass. A boy holds up a card with a three on it.
[Honk]
The announcer stands and says, NEW KOI RULES THE QUAD!
[Clapping]
Ivanka and Viktor high five. Mikey, Tiffany, Prisha and Salwa hug.
[Hands slap]
Tiffany asks, ARE WE DONE YET?
[Upbeat music plays]
Kids run through a school gate and part ways.
Prisha says, UM, MIKEY, WE JUST LOST TO
THE NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK.
Mikey says, IT'S SWEET, GOTTA HANG TOUGH.
Tiffany says, STEP BY STEP, I GUESS.
Mikey says, YEAH, THEY RULE THE QUAD NOW,
BUT QUADS ARE JUST BITUMEN AND
GRAVEL, DEPENDING ON THE SCHOOL.
AND RULING IT?
THAT'S JUST A TITLE.
BUT TEAM MAHAKI IS BLOOD AND
FLESH. AND BROS, BROS.
Salwa says, DUH.
Mikey says, WE NEED TO MAKE A THING THAT
MAKES THINGS OFFICIAL.
Prisha says, A PACT?
Mikey says, YEAH.
Prisha says, THIS IS A JERRY MOMENT. DIALLING.
Tiffany says, UH, I'VE GOT A SUIT
FIT FOR MY DADS' WEDDING.
I SHOULD SCOOT.
Prisha says, HIT THE BRAKES
ON THAT, SCOOTER.
[Beep]
Mikey says, SO, BRO, WE'RE MAKING A PACT.
Jerry says, AND WHAT ARE WE PACTING?
Mikey says, THAT A BRO NEVER LEAVES A
BRO BEHIND.
Jerry says, INDEED. WHAT ELSE?
Prisha suggests, TO WIN STATIES?
Salwa says, AND TO SHOP LOCAL.
Jerry says, AND TO ONLY EAT YELLOW
SNAKES BECAUSE YELLOW ARE THE BEST.
Mikey asks, TIFF?
Tiffany says, PACT SEEMS PRETTY
PACKED, OKAY.
Salwa says, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
AND TO ALL GO TO THE SAME HIGH
SCHOOL NEXT YEAR?
NO, SERIOUSLY, MY COUSIN HANI
ISN'T FRIENDS WITH ANY OF HIS
SCHOOL FRIENDS NOW BECAUSE THEY
ALL WENT TO DIFFERENT HIGH SCHOOLS.
SAME FOR MY COUSIN ABDULLAH, FATIMA.
Jerry says, HIGH SCHOOL CAN SPELL OUT THE
END OF FRIENDSHIP. I'LL BE BACK IN
TIME FOR THAT. I'D BE HONOURED.
Mikey says, SAME AS.
Prisha says, LOVING THIS.
I'M IN. LET'S DO IT.
Salwa says, I'M GETTING EMOTIONAL.
YOU IN, TIFF?
Tiffany says, I REALLY CAN'T, OKAY?
SUIT FIT AND ALL.
Mikey says, SUITS CAN WAIT.
LET'S MAKE A SUPER-SECRET SKUX
HANDSHAKE.
Prisha says, SO IN.
Mikey says, TEAM MAHAKI
SUPER SKUX SECRET HANDSHAKE.
Jerry asks, DOES IT MATTER THAT I'M ALL
THE WAY IN W.A.?
Mikey says, NO, BRO.
Prisha says, WAIT, WAIT.
A PACT IS LIKE A SUPER CONTRACT,
YEAH? WE DO THIS, IT'S LIKE THE MOST
UNBREAKABLE RULEY-EST RULE EVER.
OKAY, GANG?
Salwa and Mikey say, COOL.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey, Salwa, Prisha, Tiffany and Jerry move their hands.
[Laughing, tire squeaks]
Words on a ball reads “Rugby League.”
Daddy says, ALL RIGHT, LAST SET.
DRAW AND PASS THAT BIN, BOY.
Mikey says, YEP.
Daddy says, LET'S GO. NICE.
Mikey and Daddy pass the ball as they run past bins. Mikey knocks a bin over.
Daddy says, NICE DRAWING AND PASSING,
BOY. LUCKY THE BIN WAS HALF FULL, EH?
[Car engines]
Mikey says, EH, DADDY, SOME RUSSIAN TWINS
WHO AREN'T ACTUALLY RUSSIAN
ARRIVED AT SCHOOL TODAY.
Daddy says, SWEET AS.
Mikey confesses, THEY RULE THE QUAD NOW.
Daddy says, HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US,
EH, BOY?
Mikey says, IT'S LIKE THEY'RE ROBOTS FROM
THE FUTURE WHO ARE SENT TO
DESTROY US.
Mikey and Daddy pull bins into a garage.
[Rolling bins]
Daddy says, WHEN I WAS A BOY, BOY, THERE
WAS THIS GAME - TRIPLE DRAGON.
I USED TO BEAT YOUR UNCLE BENJI
EVERY DAY AT THE FISH AND CHIP SHOP.
Mikey says, SWEET AS.
Daddy says, I WAS SO GOOD,
GOT TO A POINT I STOPPED TRYING.
BUT BENJI, HE TRAINED, GOT BETTER.
NOW, HIS PHOTO'S IN THE FISH AND
CHIP SHOP AS TRIPLE DRAGON CHAMP.
Mikey says, NOT SWEET AS.
Daddy says, WHEN YOU'RE TOP DOG,
YOU GOTTA WORK TWICE AS HARD
TO KEEP THOSE WOLVES FROM TAKING
YOUR THRONE BACK TO THE FUTURE.
Mikey says, I THINK DADDY MAY HAVE MIXED
UP METAPHORS THERE, EH?
[Energetic music plays]
Men run on a rugby field.
Daddy says, HEY, BOY.
JUMP IN; WE'RE SHORT.
[Ball smacks]
Mikey says, SWEET AS.
Daddy says, PRETEND IT'S A BIN, BOY.
THIS TIME, CONTACT.
HEY! GOOD STUFF, BOY.
[Whoosh, slide whistle]
A red-haired woman says, HELLO.
Mikey says, OH! HEY, MS.
YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'VE HAD A
MAKEOVER BY THE FAB FIVE.
The woman says, ALLOW ME
TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.
I'M BLAZEY BLAPPER
Mikey says, AND I'M BLIKEY BLAHAKI.
THAT'S A GOOD ONE, MS. CRAPPER.
Ms. Blapper, OH, NO. BLIKEY. I'M MS. BLAPPER.
MS. CRAPPER'S MY TWIN.
BEAT HER TO THE WORLD BY THIRTEEN
SECONDS AND SHE'S BEEN PLAYING
CATCH UP EVER SINCE. BEVERLY!
Ms. Crapper turns to look at her twin.
Ms. Crapper says, BLAZEY.
Mikey says, EXCUSE MY FRENCH, BUT HOLY
BLAP, THAT'S MS. CRAPPER. SORRY, MS.
MY NAME'S ACTUALLY MIKEY.
Ms. Blapper says, I'M MS. BLAPPER –
GARDENING GURU, FOOTY FANATIC AND
PRINCIPAL AT BUTTERFIELD COLLEGE.
Mikey says, CHOICE CV.
Ms. Blapper says, I DIG YOUR MOVES
OUT THERE, MIKEY.
EVER DREAMED OF FOOTBALL?
Mikey says, NOT REALLY.
I JUST DREAM ABOUT UNICORN POO GELATO.
Ms. Blapper says, I HEAR IT'S DELICIOUS.
Mikey says, IT IS.
Ms. Blapper says, BUTTERFIELD OFFERS
A RUGBY SCHOLARSHIP. TRIALS ARE JUST
AROUND THE CORNER.
IT COULD CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
Mikey says, FOR REAL?
Ms. Blapper says, YOU'D BE A STRONG CONTENDER
AND A WONDERFUL STUDENT AT BUTTERFIELD.
APPLICATIONS CLOSE SOON.
THINK ABOUT IT.
[Birds chirp]
Mikey walks back to the field as Ms. Crapper approaches Ms. Blapper.
Ms. Crapper says, WHAT ARE YOU UP TO, BLAZEY?
Ms. Blapper says, NEVER YOU MIND, BEVERLY.
[Rock music plays]
[Whoosh, sizzle]
Auntie holds an umbrella as she barbecues on a grill built to look like the back end of a classic car.
Salwa says, AUNTIE SHOULD TOTALLY GO ON
THAT COOKING SHOW WHERE THEY
CALL EACH OTHER NAMES AND CRY
ALL THE TIME.
Prisha asks,YOU COOL WITH MUSTARD, TIFF?
Tiffany says, MUSTARD'S TOTALLY FINE, OKAY.
Mikey says, UH, HEY, GUYS, I GOT THE BEST
NEWS TODAY: BUTTERFIELD--
Salwa says, BRO, WE'RE OFFERING
TIFF MUSTARD.
Mikey says, OH, SORRY, BRO.
Salwa says, THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BRO.
PACT BROS DON'T INTERRUPT OTHER
PACT BROS.
Tiffany says, GUESS I'LL HAVE THE SPICY
ONE, THEN.
Prisha says, COMING RIGHT UP.
WHAT WAS YOUR BUTTERFIELD NEWS?
Mikey says, OH, NOTHING BIG OR
LIFE-CHANGING OR ANYTHING.
NOTHING THAT'LL BREAK UP THE
PACT BROS OR STOP US FROM GOING
TO THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL.
Prisha picks up a tray of condiments.
[Scraping]
Mikey says, JUST, UH, MS. CRAPPER, SHE HAS A
TWIN - MS. BLAPPER.
YEAH, THAT'S IT, NOTHING ELSE.
Salwa says, WHOA, WHOA.
ONE CRAPPER'S ENOUGH IN THE
WORLD, BRO.
Mikey says, NAH, SHE'S SWEET AS,
AND SHE'S A FAN OF UNICORN POO.
Auntie smiles as she puts down a tray.
She says, SNAGS UP. DIG IN.
Mikey says, THANKS, AUNTIE.
[Clinking utensils]
Salwa says, OI, P, CHECK IT.
Salwa gives Prisha a checkered gift bag with purple tissue paper.
Prisha says, WOW. FOR ME?
Salwa says, DUH. OPEN IT.
GOT ONE FOR ME, TOO.
[Rustling]
Prisha puts on a black ballcap. White writing on the front reads “Coach.”
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH, LOVING THIS.
Mikey says, YEAH. YOU GUYS LOOK
LIKE FULLY SICK RAPPERS.
Salwa says, I GOT SOMETHING FOR THE OTHER
NOOB. OI, TIFF! I MADE YOU A DESSERT.
I NAMED IT AFTER YOU - TIFF LAVA.
IT'S BASICALLY LIKE NORMAL
BAKLAVA, BUT IT'S SPICY, LIKE YOU.
Tiffany says, UM, WEIRD, OKAY.
Salwa says, NAH.
FRIENDS DO THIS STUFF.
THIS PACT THING IS SWEET.
STICKING TOGETHER FOREVER,
BASICALLY LIKE ONE BIG GOOEY
BAKLAVA.
Prisha says, TO TIFF-LAVA!
Mikey, Prisha and Salwa hold up their sausages.
Salwa asks, TIFF, ARE YOU GOING TO JOIN US?
Tiffany says, I CAN'T DO THIS, OKAY?
I DON'T FIT IN THIS TEAM.
Salwa says, WHAT?
YOU TOTALLY FIT.
Mikey says, YEAH, LIKE A GOOD
PAIR OF UNDIES, BRO.
Tiffany says, GROSS.
NO, OKAY. I JUST DON'T FIT.
Salwaasks, IS THIS BECAUSE OF THE
TIFF-LAVA?
Tiffany says, NO.
Auntie asks, THE SNAGS?
Tiffany says, NO.
Prisha asks, BECAUSE WE LOST?
Tiffany says, GEEZ!
NO, OKAY. I'M JUST, JUST OUT.
Mikey says, BUT WE'RE FRIENDS.
[Sad music plays]
Tiffany says, WE'RE NOT.
I DON'T DO FRIENDS.
I'M OUT OF HANDBALL, OUT OF TEAM
MAHAKI, OUT OF STATIES, OUT OF
THIS STUPID SAUSAGE CLUB!
NO OFFENCE, AUNTIE.
Auntie says, NONE TAKEN, NONE TAKEN.
Tiffany drops the Tiff-Lava on the floor.
Auntie says, THAT'S YOUR
DOUBLES PARTNER, EH?
[Upbeat music plays]
End credits roll:
“Directed by Darren Ashton.
Series Producer: Joe Weatherstone.
Executive Producers: Catherine Nebauer.
Bernadette O’Mahony.
Jan Stradling.
Cast:
Mikey: Semisi Cheekam.
Salwa: Reannah Hamdan.
Jerry: Logan Reberger.
Tiffany: Erin Choy.
Prisha: Holly Simon.
Ivanka: Ella Holowell.
Viktor: Sam Everingham.
Ms. Crapper/Blapper: Helen Dallimore
Auntie: Maria Walker.
Daddy: Daya-Tumua Sao-Mafiti.
A Northern Pictures Production.
Mikey dances.
ABC. Developed and Produced in Association with the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.
Text reads “Screen Australia and The Australian Broadcasting Corporation Present. In association with The Australian Children’s Television Foundation and Screen NSW. A Northern Pictures Production.”
Children rap, A NEW DAY DAWNS IN
THE WILD WILD WEST,
WHEN A STATE WILL DISCOVER
WHO WILL BE THE BEST
AND YOU KNOW WHEN THE GOING
GETS TOUGH,
TEAM MAHAKI DIGS DOWN
AND USE THE RIGHT STUFF
A boy with short black hair walks with his hands in his pocket. He wears a navy and grey school jacket and a light blue shirt. Text beneath him reads “Mikey.” A girl with long black hair pulled away from her face wears a white shirt. Text beneath her reads “Salwa.” A boy wears his short brown hair parted on the right. He wears a navy and grey school jacket. Text beneath him reads “Jerry.” A girl wears a grey and navy school jacket over her white shirt. Her dark hair is pulled back into two buns. Text beneath her reads “Prisha.”
Children sing, 'CAUSE IF YOU WANNA
PLAY HANDBALL,
THEN YOU'VE GOTTA GIVE IT
YOUR ALL
A girl wears her long dark brown hair loose over her shoulders. She wears glasses, a yellow jacket, a purple shirt and a purple plaid skirt. Text beneath her says “Tiffany.” A boy and girl with blond hair wear bright green jackets as they dance. Text beneath him reads “Viktor.” Text beneath her reads “Ivanka.”
Children sing, COME ON
'CAUSE IF YOU WANNA PLAY HANDBALL,
YOU'VE GOTTA THINK BIG, NOT SMALL
IF YOU WANNA PLAY HANDBALL,
THEN YOU'VE GOTTA PLAY HARDBALL
Text reads “Created and Written by Guy Edmonds & Matt Zeremes.” “Hardball.” Mikey wears an orange and red striped shirt.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, HEY, EVERYONE.
SWEET AS TO BE BACK, EH?
HEAPS HAS HAPPENED.
FIRST UP, PRISHA'S THE NEWEST
MEMBER OF TEAM MAHAKI.
PS: SHE'S A BBF.
BEST BRO FOREVER, EH?
WE DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER -
WATER BOMBS...
Jerry pops a water balloon.
[Pop, splash]
Mikey says, DOING DANCES.
[Dance music plays]
Salwa, Tiffany, Prisha, Mikey and Jerry dance.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, YOU'RE PROBABLY WONDERING,
"WHY IS TIFF HERE?"
WELL, ME AND TIFF HAVE FINALLY
BECOME BBFS, WHICH IS SWEET AS, EH?
PPS: TIFF FINALLY APOLOGISED TO SALWA.
Tiffany and Salwa stand in a schoolyard.
Tiffany says, SORRY, OKAY?
Salwa says, ACCEPTED, BRO.
Salwa and Tiffany pop open canisters and streamers fly out of them.
[Popping]
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey says, LEOPARDS CAN CHANGE
THEIR SPOTS. SWEET AS, EH?
IN HANDBALL LAND, SALWA'S HUNG
UP THE HANDBALLS AND PICKED UP
A CLIPBOARD.
Prisha, Salwa and Jerry hold clipboards.
Mikey says, THAT'S RIGHT, JERRY,
SALWA, AND PRISHA ARE ALL
FULL-TIME COACHES, WHICH IS
SWEET AS. SALWA'S STILL A
GUN PLAYER THOUGH, EH?
DADDY'S FINALLY PLAYING FIRST-GRADE
FOOTY, WHICH IS MEAN AS.
Daddy runs into a punching bag.
[Thump]
Mikey says, AUNTIE...
AUNTIE'S STILL AUNTIE,
BUT THAT'S SWEET AS, EH?
[Whirling]
Mikey says, AND, WHAT ELSE? OH!
THERE'S A MEAN AS HANDBALL STATE
TOURNAMENT COMING UP AND
EVERYBODY'S MAD AS ABOUT IT.
A girl with black hair and glasses holds up a sign that reads “Staties Handball Competition.” Three young teens stand on each side.
They hold up their arms and yell, STATIES!
Mikey says, BUT AT STATIES, WE HAVE
TO PLAY DOUBLES HANDBALL.
TEAM MAHAKI TWO POINT OH, SKUXXER
THAN A TRIPLE CHEESE TOASTIE.
GETTING TO STATIES IS GOING TO BE TOUGH.
BUT LUCKY FOR US, WE HAVE THE
BEST COACHES IN THE BIZ.
WHERE'S JERRY?
OH, WAIT, TOTALLY FORGOT.
Three balloons hang on a brick wall behind Jerry.
[Solemn music plays]
Jerry says, I KNOW I'M GOING ALL
THE WAY TO W.A.
BUT DESPITE THE DISTANCE, WHICH
IS IMMENSE, MY HEART WILL BE
FOREVER BOUND TO BLOCK STREET
AND MY BROS AND HANDBALL.
AND ALTHOUGH I'LL BE GONE FOREVER--
Mikey says, YOU'RE GOING FOR A TERM, BRO.
Jerry says, WELL, FOREVER SOUNDS A LOT
MORE DRAMATIC.
ALTHOUGH I'LL BE GOING FOR A
TERM, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT
OUR FRIENDSHIP SHALL ENDURE.
AS THE GREAT MACHINE FROM THE
FUTURE ONCE SAID, "I'LL COME BACK."
Mikey says, I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S
NOT THE LINE, EH, BRO?
Jerry says, PROBABLY, BUT YOU GET
THE GIST. GOODBYE.
Mikey says, GONNA MISS YOU, BRO.
Mikey, Prisha and Salwa hug Jerry. Tiffany waves awkwardly.
Prisha, Mikey and Tiffany pop streamer canisters.
[Popping]
[Squeaking, beeping]
Jerry types on the control panel for his wheelchair. He sighs and holds a solar panel. Mikey looks up at the cloudy sky.
Jerry says, THIS COULD TAKE A WHILE.
A globe spins.
[Whoosh]
Mikey sits at a desk in a classroom.
Mikey says, CONSIDER YOURSELF
UP TO DATE AS.
BACK IN HANDBALL WORLD, WE'VE
GOT TO GET THROUGH ZONE AND
REGIONALS, BUT IF WE WORK AS A
TEAM, WE'VE GOT A REAL SHOT TO
GET TO STATIES.
SO, BASICALLY, LIFE IS SKUXXER
THAN A WHEELBARROW FULL OF
UNICORN POOP.
Ms. Crapper says, CLASS SIX-B, WE HAVE
TWO VERY SPECIAL NEW STUDENTS
JOINING US TODAY.
ORIGINALLY HAILING FROM ALL THE
WAY IN W.A.--
A student says, IT'S NOT EVEN RAINING, MS.
Ms. Crapper explains, HAIL - IT'S WHERE
YOU COME FROM.
The boy asks, THEN, WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST SAY THAT?
Ms. Crapper says, THESE TWO TWIN
SPORTING PRODIGIES REALLY COME
FROM A RUSSIAN PORT TOWN, IN RUSSIA,
FAMOUS FOR ITS RUSSIAN PICKLES,
RUSSIAN BEARS AND RUSSIAN
HANDBALL, WHICH IS JUST LIKE
REGULAR HANDBALL, BUT RUSSIAN.
A VERY WELCOME AND RUSSIAN
ADDITION TO BLOCK STREET...
Ms. Crapper turns on a music player and walks to a classroom door. She opens it and a blond-haired boy and blonde-haired girl walk into the classroom.
[Russian national anthem plays]
[Door opens]
Ms. Crapper continues...IVANKA AND VIKTOR VOLKOV.
[Russian national anthem plays]
Ms. Crapper throws a ball. Ivanka catches it and crushes it in her hand.
[Gasping]
Ms. Crapper asks, CARE TO SAY A FEW WORDS?
Viktor says, THANK YOU, MS. CRAPPER.
LOOK, OUR GRANDPARENTS WERE BORN
IN RUSSIA, BUT WE'VE ALWAYS
LIVED ALL THE WAY IN W.A.
SO, NOT REALLY RUSSIAN.
BUT WE LOVE SPORT, BUT WE DON'T
LIKE PICKLES, AND NEITHER OF US
HAVE SEEN A BEAR.
Ivanka interupts, EXCEPT AT THE ZOO.
Viktor agrees, EXCEPT AT THE ZOO.
Ivanka says, CAN'T WAIT TO CRUSH YOU ALL
IN HANDBALL AND RULE THE QUAD BY
THE END OF THE DAY.
Salwa says,I DON'T KNOW.
[Bell rings]
[Upbeat music plays]
Salwa throws a ball at a circle on a wall. She misses.
Viktor and Ivanka skip.
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey asks, WHO DOES CARDIO AT RECESS?
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
Salwa sits between Mikey and Prisha.
Salwa says, JUST...NOWHERE.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey says, THEY'VE BEEN SKIPPING FOR
FIFTEEN MINUTES, NON-STOP.
Prisha says, WE SHOULD TALK TO THEM,
SUSS OUT THE COMPETITION.
Tiffany, Mikey, Salwa and Prisha approach Ivanka and Viktor.
[Ropes whooshing and hitting pavement]
Mikey says, HEY, BROS, JUST WANTED
TO SAY HI, EH?
Viktor skips as he says, MIKEY MAHAKI,
TIFFANY STEELE-STONE, SALWA ZARA
AND PRISHA PAPENSNOOZEN.
Prisha says, PAPENHUYZEN.
Ivanka says, AND LET'S NOT FORGET
YOUR NUMBER ONE COACH, JERRY
LOUIS STEVENSON.
Viktor says, WHO'S SWAPPED SCHOOLS
WITH US FOR THE TERM, YES?
Mikey says, RESEARCHED AS.
Ivanka says, PEOPLE IN THIS SCHOOL
PLAY HANDBALL LIKE BABY PUPPIES.
Salwa says, PUPPIES ARE BABIES, BRO.
Viktor says, YOU PRESENT NO THREAT TO US.
Tiffany asks, OVERCONFIDENT MUCH?
Ivanka says, YOU VS US, LUNCH.
WINNER RULES THE QUAD.
Prisha says, SORRY, GANG, BUT
TEAM MAHAKI RULE THE QUAD
AROUND HERE. SO, YEAH, YEAH.
Viktor says, PROVE IT.
AT LUNCH, WE BATTLE.
A boy with short hair says, LUNCH BATTLE!
[Dramatic music plays]
Viktor and Ivanka each balance a yellow handball on a knee as they hold handballs in each hand. They bounce the balls in their hands on the ground.
[Thump]
Jerry appears on a tablet.
Jerry says, I'LL FIND OUT WHAT I CAN
ABOUT THEM FROM HERE.
BOUND TO BE BREADCRUMBS
Mikey says, YEAH, WE'LL DO THE SAME.
Jerry says, I IMAGINE THEY'LL BE
FORMIDABLE OPPONENTS.
THIS SCHOOL IS QUITE LITERALLY
A HANDBALL PALACE.
Salwa says, AND IF THEIR HANDBALL'S
HALF AS INTENSE AS THEM,
WE'RE IN A TOUGHER BATTLE
THAN WHEN MY COUSIN WON
HIS JUNIOR JU-JITSU TOURNAMENT.
Mikey says, YEAH, IT'S JUST A CHALLENGE.
WE'RE ALWAYS DOWN FOR A
CHALLENGE, RIGHT?
Salwa, Tiffany and Prisha say, RIGHT.
[Balls bounce]
Prisha asks, DO YOU THINK HE GOT MY NAME
WRONG ON PURPOSE? MOVING RIGHT ALONG.
[Balls bounce]
[Dramatic music plays]
Kevin says, I DON'T CARE ABOUT
YOUR DUMB LUNCH BATTLE.
I DIDN'T WANT TO COACH YOU AFTER
MY BABY-BRO AND MY PARENTS WENT
ALL THE WAY TO W.A., WHICH I ALSO
DON'T CARE ABOUT.
[Chiming]
Prisha says, KEVIN, I'M SORRY YOU'RE UPSET
I GOT THE COACHING GIG, AND I'M
SORRY YOU FEEL ABANDONED BY
YOUR FAMILY.
Prisha says, I'M NOT UPSET; YOU'RE UPSET.
[Chiming]
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH, EXCEPT I'M NOT
AND IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS YOU ARE.
Kevin says, WELL, WHATEVER. SO, WHAT?
YOU WANT ME TO ACCESS
THE VOVO'S SPORTING RECORDS?
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, VOLKOVS.
Kevin says, YOU WANT ME TO ACCESS THE
VOLBROM'S SPORTING RECORDS--
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, VOLKOVS.
Kevin says, --SEE IF THERE'S ANY RESEARCH
AND THEN PASS ON SAID RESEARCH
TO YOU SO THAT YOU DON'T GET AN
ALL-TIME BUTT KICK?
[Chiming]
Prisha says, SO, LONG AS IT'S BTB, IT'S
OKAY WITH ME.
Mikey explains, "BY THE BOOK."
IT'S KIND OF HER THING.
Kevin says, I'D LOVE TO HELP.
Salwa, Mikey, Prisha and Tiffany say, REALLY?
Salwa and Prish say, AWESOME, THANKS.
Mikey says, COOL.
[Chime]
Kevin says, EXCEPT THE SYSTEM'S DOWN.
NOW, MAKE LIKE ELVIS AND GET OUT
OF HERE, THE WAY YOU CAME IN.
LEAVE! SCRAM!
[Energetic music plays]
Ms. Crapper glances up from writing. She looks around the classroom, then goes back to her work.
Salwa says, PSST, GUYS.
WHAT ABOUT THAT VOLKOV FOLDER
MS. WAS LOOKING IN? DO YOU RECKON
THERE'S ANYTHING IN THERE?
Tiffany says, MAYBE, BUT EVERY SINGLE
ATHLETE I KNOW HAS A SUPER
STRICT DIET.
Salwa says, SO?
Tiffany says, SO, MAYBE THE VOLKOVS HAVE
GOT SOME SUPER FOOD THAT MAKES
THEM SUPER AWESOME?
Mikey says, WHOLEMEAL TOAST?
Tiffany says, MAYBE.
Prisha says, CHIA TORTILLA?
Tiffany says, MAYBE.
Salwa says, POMEGRANATE MOLASSES?
Tiffany says, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS,
BUT MAYBE.
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH.
MAYBE WE SPLIT UP.
MIKEY, TIFF, YOU FIND A WAY TO
GET OUT OF CLASS, LEGALLY.
FIND THAT FOLDER AND CHECK THEIR
LUNCH BOXES.
BUT JUST LOOK, DON'T TAKE.
NO HARM IN THAT... I THINK.
IS THERE?
Salwa says, NO.
PLEASE RELAX.
WHAT ABOUT US?
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?
Prisha say, WE STAKE OUT VIKTOR.
Salwa says, ONLY VIKTOR?
Prisha says, AND IVANKA.
WE STAKE OUT VIKTOR AND IVANKA.
Mikey says, NICE THINKING, P.,
OPERATION MAHAKI RESEARCH
TASK IS A GO.
Tiffany puts up her hand.
Ms. Crapper says, YES?
Tiffany says, MS, I LEFT MY STUDY BOOK
IN THE QUAD. CAN I GO GET IT?
Ms. Crapper says, TAKE A BUDDY.
Mikey says, WE'RE MOVING.
Mikey moves a chair.
[Thump]
Viktor and Ivanka trade papers.
[Rustle of paper]
[Door opens]
Mikey says, YOU GET THE LUNCH,
I'LL GET THE FOLDERS.
Tiffany says, GOT IT.
[Mikey inhales and exhales sharply]
Tiffany kneels by a backpack. She opens a lunch box and looks inside. She shuts it and puts it back.
[Clanking]
Viktor moves his shoulder and arm.
[Electronic whirring]
Salwa asks, WHAT IS HE DOING?
Prisha says, NO I-DE-A.
[Electronic whirring]
Viktor throws a handball to Ivanka. She throws it at a poster. It bounces off of a clock and whizzes past Mustafa’s face. The ball lands in a garbage basket.
Mustafa says, WHOA!
Ms. Crapper says, MUSTAFA, SILENCE!
Tiffany gives a thumbs up.
Mikey says, LET'S GO.
A boy and girl sing, YOU KNOW THAT
WE'RE UNBEATABLE
IT'S FAR FROM INCON--
A girl says, OH, HEY, GUYS.
Mikey and Tiffany say, HEY.
Mikey asks, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?
The boy says, WE'RE WRITING A
TOP-SECRET MUSICAL.
IT'S CALLED HANDBALL: THE
MUSICAL. WE'RE HOPING TO
PREMIERE IT AT STATIES.
Tiffany says, SOUNDS PRETTY
TOP SECRET, OKAY.
The girl says, YEAH, WE'VE ALREADY SAID TOO
MUCH, BUT IT'S GONNA BE AMAZE.
The boy sings, AMAZING
Mikey says, WELL, WE'RE ON A
TOP-SECRET MISSION, AS WELL.
IT'S ALSO AMAZE BECAUSE I DON'T
KNOW WHERE TO GO NEXT.
The boy says, OKAY, WELL, THERE'S A WHOLE
THING GOING ON THERE, BUT, TIFF,
THERE'S A PART FOR YOU IF YOU
WANT TO GET THE BAND BACK TOGETHER?
Tiffany says, WE SHOULD GET GOING.
The boy says, YEAH, IT'S FINE.
I MEAN, THERE'S LOTS OF OTHER
PEOPLE INTERESTED IN THE ROLE.
The girl says, YEAH, LIKE HIS MUM.
The boy says, LIKE MY MUM.
Tiffany says, COOL.
WHAT'S THIS?
Mikey says, IT'S YOUR BOOK.
SO, CRAPPER DOESN'T ASK
ANY QUESTIONS.
Tiffany says, OH, RIGHT, MY ALIBI.
YEAH, THANKS, MIKEY, OKAY.
Mikey says, GOT YOUR BACK, BRO.
Mikey and Tiffany walk back to their desks.
Prisha asks, WHERE WE AT, GANG?
Mikey says, I GOT MS.'S FOLDER
AND IT WAS FULL OF...
[Dramatic music]
Flashback: A folder opens. Inside is a schedule of “Bullfrog Homegames.”
Salway says, BULLFROGS? ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Prisha asks, TIFF?
Tiffany says, SO, I GOT TO THEIR LUNCH
BOXES AND IT WAS LOADED WITH...
Tiffany opens a lunchbox. Inside is a unicorn-shaped cookie.
[Whinnying]
Prisha asks, EVEN VIKTOR'S?
Tiffany says, EVERY ONE, CUT
LIKE A UNICORN.
Prisha says, OH, MY GOSH, SO CUTE.
Mikey says, UNLESS YOU GUYS GOT
SOMETHING, WE'VE GOT NOTHING.
Salwa says, WELL, THEY KNOCKED A BALL ALL
OVER THE ROOM AND IT LANDED IN A BIN.
Prisha says, OFF SIX REBOUNDS.
VIKTOR'S SHOT DESIGN IS OFF THE CHARTS.
Mikey says, SIX REBOUNDS, FOR REAL?
Mikey says, YEAH, YEAH.
I DID NOTICE ONE THING, THOUGH.
THEY'RE BOTH AMBIDEXTROUS.
Mikey says, AMBI-WHO-STROUS?
Salwa explains, THEY CAN USE BOTH
HANDS AS GOOD AS EACH OTHER.
Prisha says, THIS MORNING, IVANKA CAUGHT
THE BALL WITH HER LEFT HAND, BUT
WHILE YOU WERE GONE, SHE CAUGHT
IT WITH HER RIGHT.
Mikey says, SKUX DISCOVERY, BROS.
BUT YOU SAID BOTH OF...
OH, I BET HE DOES HIS HOMEWORK
REALLY QUICK.
Tiffany says, SO, HOW'S THIS HELPING?
Prisha says, AS DOUBLES PLAYERS,
YOU STICK TO ONE SIDE OF THE COURT,
DEPENDING ON YOUR DOMINANT
HAND, YEAH?
THE VOLKOVS CAN PLAY ANY SIDE,
ANY TIME, ANY HAND.
Salwa says, WHAT?
[Bell rings]
Mikey says, JERRY MOMENT.
Prisha holds a cellphone. Jerry appears on it.
Jerry says, SO, I KNOW YOU'RE ABOUT TO
GO INTO BATTLE, BUT I WATCHED THIS
COACHING AMA LAST NIGHT, AND
THE GENTLEMAN SAID, "ALONE,
YOU'RE WEAK; TOGETHER YOU'RE--
Salwa says, TOGETHER, YOU'RE STRONG.
Mikey says, SKUX ADVICE.
Jerry says, OKAY THEN, JERRY OUT.
Prisha says, OKAY, SO, MIKEY, YOU GOT
POWER - STAY ON THE BASELINE.
TIFF, YOU'VE GOT SPEED, SO GO UP
FRONT. LET'S GO.
[Intense music plays as Viktor and Ivanka carry cases. They put them down.
[Thunk]
Students sit on benches as Mikey and Tiffany step into their quad squares.
A boy with short black hair announces, OKAY,
HAPPY HANDBALLERS. TIME FOR FUN TIME.
FIRST TO THREE. DOUBLES DOWNTOWN.
FOLLOW THE RULES AND LOVE THE
RULES. COOL TIMES?
Ivanka says, WE'RE GONNA CRUSH YOU.
Tiffany says, NOT IF WE CRUSH
YOU FIRST, OKAY?
Viktor says, WE'RE UNCRUSHABLE.
Mikey says, LIKE AN ALUMINIUM CAN FULL OF
SUGARY FLAVOURED BUBBLE WATER.
Ivanka crushes a can and throws it.
[Crushing, clank]
Mikey says, YOU KNOW
HOW THEY SAY ACTIONS
SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS?
I CAN SEE WHY, EH?
The announcer says, BEGIN TIME!
[Honk]
[Dramatic music plays, ball bounces, whoosh]
A ball flies between Mikey and Tiffany.
[Honk, cheering]
Mikey says, HOLY-LOOLIE.
WE'LL GET THEM NEXT POINT, EH?
[Honk, whoosh]
Ivanka serves a ball and it flies between Mikey and Tiffany.
Salwa says, TIME OUT, TIME OUT.
Prisha says, THEY'RE PLAYING A LOW GAME.
Salwa says, YEAH.
THEY'RE DRAGGING SICK AS.
DROP YOUR CENTRES OF GRAVITIES.
Prisha says, LOVING THE TECH TALK.
Salwa says, BIOLOGY'S MY
FAVOURITE SUBJECT.
AND OI, HIT THE BALL HIGH.
THAT'LL SMASH THEIR LOW GAME.
Announcer says, BEGIN TIME.
[Honk, dramatic music plays]
Mikey serves the ball.
[Ball bounces]
Ivanka hits a ball between Mikey and Tiffany. They watch it pass. A boy holds up a card with a three on it.
[Honk]
The announcer stands and says, NEW KOI RULES THE QUAD!
[Clapping]
Ivanka and Viktor high five. Mikey, Tiffany, Prisha and Salwa hug.
[Hands slap]
Tiffany asks, ARE WE DONE YET?
[Upbeat music plays]
Kids run through a school gate and part ways.
Prisha says, UM, MIKEY, WE JUST LOST TO
THE NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK.
Mikey says, IT'S SWEET, GOTTA HANG TOUGH.
Tiffany says, STEP BY STEP, I GUESS.
Mikey says, YEAH, THEY RULE THE QUAD NOW,
BUT QUADS ARE JUST BITUMEN AND
GRAVEL, DEPENDING ON THE SCHOOL.
AND RULING IT?
THAT'S JUST A TITLE.
BUT TEAM MAHAKI IS BLOOD AND
FLESH. AND BROS, BROS.
Salwa says, DUH.
Mikey says, WE NEED TO MAKE A THING THAT
MAKES THINGS OFFICIAL.
Prisha says, A PACT?
Mikey says, YEAH.
Prisha says, THIS IS A JERRY MOMENT. DIALLING.
Tiffany says, UH, I'VE GOT A SUIT
FIT FOR MY DADS' WEDDING.
I SHOULD SCOOT.
Prisha says, HIT THE BRAKES
ON THAT, SCOOTER.
[Beep]
Mikey says, SO, BRO, WE'RE MAKING A PACT.
Jerry says, AND WHAT ARE WE PACTING?
Mikey says, THAT A BRO NEVER LEAVES A
BRO BEHIND.
Jerry says, INDEED. WHAT ELSE?
Prisha suggests, TO WIN STATIES?
Salwa says, AND TO SHOP LOCAL.
Jerry says, AND TO ONLY EAT YELLOW
SNAKES BECAUSE YELLOW ARE THE BEST.
Mikey asks, TIFF?
Tiffany says, PACT SEEMS PRETTY
PACKED, OKAY.
Salwa says, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
AND TO ALL GO TO THE SAME HIGH
SCHOOL NEXT YEAR?
NO, SERIOUSLY, MY COUSIN HANI
ISN'T FRIENDS WITH ANY OF HIS
SCHOOL FRIENDS NOW BECAUSE THEY
ALL WENT TO DIFFERENT HIGH SCHOOLS.
SAME FOR MY COUSIN ABDULLAH, FATIMA.
Jerry says, HIGH SCHOOL CAN SPELL OUT THE
END OF FRIENDSHIP. I'LL BE BACK IN
TIME FOR THAT. I'D BE HONOURED.
Mikey says, SAME AS.
Prisha says, LOVING THIS.
I'M IN. LET'S DO IT.
Salwa says, I'M GETTING EMOTIONAL.
YOU IN, TIFF?
Tiffany says, I REALLY CAN'T, OKAY?
SUIT FIT AND ALL.
Mikey says, SUITS CAN WAIT.
LET'S MAKE A SUPER-SECRET SKUX
HANDSHAKE.
Prisha says, SO IN.
Mikey says, TEAM MAHAKI
SUPER SKUX SECRET HANDSHAKE.
Jerry asks, DOES IT MATTER THAT I'M ALL
THE WAY IN W.A.?
Mikey says, NO, BRO.
Prisha says, WAIT, WAIT.
A PACT IS LIKE A SUPER CONTRACT,
YEAH? WE DO THIS, IT'S LIKE THE MOST
UNBREAKABLE RULEY-EST RULE EVER.
OKAY, GANG?
Salwa and Mikey say, COOL.
[Exciting music plays]
Mikey, Salwa, Prisha, Tiffany and Jerry move their hands.
[Laughing, tire squeaks]
Words on a ball reads “Rugby League.”
Daddy says, ALL RIGHT, LAST SET.
DRAW AND PASS THAT BIN, BOY.
Mikey says, YEP.
Daddy says, LET'S GO. NICE.
Mikey and Daddy pass the ball as they run past bins. Mikey knocks a bin over.
Daddy says, NICE DRAWING AND PASSING,
BOY. LUCKY THE BIN WAS HALF FULL, EH?
[Car engines]
Mikey says, EH, DADDY, SOME RUSSIAN TWINS
WHO AREN'T ACTUALLY RUSSIAN
ARRIVED AT SCHOOL TODAY.
Daddy says, SWEET AS.
Mikey confesses, THEY RULE THE QUAD NOW.
Daddy says, HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US,
EH, BOY?
Mikey says, IT'S LIKE THEY'RE ROBOTS FROM
THE FUTURE WHO ARE SENT TO
DESTROY US.
Mikey and Daddy pull bins into a garage.
[Rolling bins]
Daddy says, WHEN I WAS A BOY, BOY, THERE
WAS THIS GAME - TRIPLE DRAGON.
I USED TO BEAT YOUR UNCLE BENJI
EVERY DAY AT THE FISH AND CHIP SHOP.
Mikey says, SWEET AS.
Daddy says, I WAS SO GOOD,
GOT TO A POINT I STOPPED TRYING.
BUT BENJI, HE TRAINED, GOT BETTER.
NOW, HIS PHOTO'S IN THE FISH AND
CHIP SHOP AS TRIPLE DRAGON CHAMP.
Mikey says, NOT SWEET AS.
Daddy says, WHEN YOU'RE TOP DOG,
YOU GOTTA WORK TWICE AS HARD
TO KEEP THOSE WOLVES FROM TAKING
YOUR THRONE BACK TO THE FUTURE.
Mikey says, I THINK DADDY MAY HAVE MIXED
UP METAPHORS THERE, EH?
[Energetic music plays]
Men run on a rugby field.
Daddy says, HEY, BOY.
JUMP IN; WE'RE SHORT.
[Ball smacks]
Mikey says, SWEET AS.
Daddy says, PRETEND IT'S A BIN, BOY.
THIS TIME, CONTACT.
HEY! GOOD STUFF, BOY.
[Whoosh, slide whistle]
A red-haired woman says, HELLO.
Mikey says, OH! HEY, MS.
YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'VE HAD A
MAKEOVER BY THE FAB FIVE.
The woman says, ALLOW ME
TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.
I'M BLAZEY BLAPPER
Mikey says, AND I'M BLIKEY BLAHAKI.
THAT'S A GOOD ONE, MS. CRAPPER.
Ms. Blapper, OH, NO. BLIKEY. I'M MS. BLAPPER.
MS. CRAPPER'S MY TWIN.
BEAT HER TO THE WORLD BY THIRTEEN
SECONDS AND SHE'S BEEN PLAYING
CATCH UP EVER SINCE. BEVERLY!
Ms. Crapper turns to look at her twin.
Ms. Crapper says, BLAZEY.
Mikey says, EXCUSE MY FRENCH, BUT HOLY
BLAP, THAT'S MS. CRAPPER. SORRY, MS.
MY NAME'S ACTUALLY MIKEY.
Ms. Blapper says, I'M MS. BLAPPER –
GARDENING GURU, FOOTY FANATIC AND
PRINCIPAL AT BUTTERFIELD COLLEGE.
Mikey says, CHOICE CV.
Ms. Blapper says, I DIG YOUR MOVES
OUT THERE, MIKEY.
EVER DREAMED OF FOOTBALL?
Mikey says, NOT REALLY.
I JUST DREAM ABOUT UNICORN POO GELATO.
Ms. Blapper says, I HEAR IT'S DELICIOUS.
Mikey says, IT IS.
Ms. Blapper says, BUTTERFIELD OFFERS
A RUGBY SCHOLARSHIP. TRIALS ARE JUST
AROUND THE CORNER.
IT COULD CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
Mikey says, FOR REAL?
Ms. Blapper says, YOU'D BE A STRONG CONTENDER
AND A WONDERFUL STUDENT AT BUTTERFIELD.
APPLICATIONS CLOSE SOON.
THINK ABOUT IT.
[Birds chirp]
Mikey walks back to the field as Ms. Crapper approaches Ms. Blapper.
Ms. Crapper says, WHAT ARE YOU UP TO, BLAZEY?
Ms. Blapper says, NEVER YOU MIND, BEVERLY.
[Rock music plays]
[Whoosh, sizzle]
Auntie holds an umbrella as she barbecues on a grill built to look like the back end of a classic car.
Salwa says, AUNTIE SHOULD TOTALLY GO ON
THAT COOKING SHOW WHERE THEY
CALL EACH OTHER NAMES AND CRY
ALL THE TIME.
Prisha asks,YOU COOL WITH MUSTARD, TIFF?
Tiffany says, MUSTARD'S TOTALLY FINE, OKAY.
Mikey says, UH, HEY, GUYS, I GOT THE BEST
NEWS TODAY: BUTTERFIELD--
Salwa says, BRO, WE'RE OFFERING
TIFF MUSTARD.
Mikey says, OH, SORRY, BRO.
Salwa says, THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BRO.
PACT BROS DON'T INTERRUPT OTHER
PACT BROS.
Tiffany says, GUESS I'LL HAVE THE SPICY
ONE, THEN.
Prisha says, COMING RIGHT UP.
WHAT WAS YOUR BUTTERFIELD NEWS?
Mikey says, OH, NOTHING BIG OR
LIFE-CHANGING OR ANYTHING.
NOTHING THAT'LL BREAK UP THE
PACT BROS OR STOP US FROM GOING
TO THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL.
Prisha picks up a tray of condiments.
[Scraping]
Mikey says, JUST, UH, MS. CRAPPER, SHE HAS A
TWIN - MS. BLAPPER.
YEAH, THAT'S IT, NOTHING ELSE.
Salwa says, WHOA, WHOA.
ONE CRAPPER'S ENOUGH IN THE
WORLD, BRO.
Mikey says, NAH, SHE'S SWEET AS,
AND SHE'S A FAN OF UNICORN POO.
Auntie smiles as she puts down a tray.
She says, SNAGS UP. DIG IN.
Mikey says, THANKS, AUNTIE.
[Clinking utensils]
Salwa says, OI, P, CHECK IT.
Salwa gives Prisha a checkered gift bag with purple tissue paper.
Prisha says, WOW. FOR ME?
Salwa says, DUH. OPEN IT.
GOT ONE FOR ME, TOO.
[Rustling]
Prisha puts on a black ballcap. White writing on the front reads “Coach.”
Prisha says, YEAH, YEAH, LOVING THIS.
Mikey says, YEAH. YOU GUYS LOOK
LIKE FULLY SICK RAPPERS.
Salwa says, I GOT SOMETHING FOR THE OTHER
NOOB. OI, TIFF! I MADE YOU A DESSERT.
I NAMED IT AFTER YOU - TIFF LAVA.
IT'S BASICALLY LIKE NORMAL
BAKLAVA, BUT IT'S SPICY, LIKE YOU.
Tiffany says, UM, WEIRD, OKAY.
Salwa says, NAH.
FRIENDS DO THIS STUFF.
THIS PACT THING IS SWEET.
STICKING TOGETHER FOREVER,
BASICALLY LIKE ONE BIG GOOEY
BAKLAVA.
Prisha says, TO TIFF-LAVA!
Mikey, Prisha and Salwa hold up their sausages.
Salwa asks, TIFF, ARE YOU GOING TO JOIN US?
Tiffany says, I CAN'T DO THIS, OKAY?
I DON'T FIT IN THIS TEAM.
Salwa says, WHAT?
YOU TOTALLY FIT.
Mikey says, YEAH, LIKE A GOOD
PAIR OF UNDIES, BRO.
Tiffany says, GROSS.
NO, OKAY. I JUST DON'T FIT.
Salwaasks, IS THIS BECAUSE OF THE
TIFF-LAVA?
Tiffany says, NO.
Auntie asks, THE SNAGS?
Tiffany says, NO.
Prisha asks, BECAUSE WE LOST?
Tiffany says, GEEZ!
NO, OKAY. I'M JUST, JUST OUT.
Mikey says, BUT WE'RE FRIENDS.
[Sad music plays]
Tiffany says, WE'RE NOT.
I DON'T DO FRIENDS.
I'M OUT OF HANDBALL, OUT OF TEAM
MAHAKI, OUT OF STATIES, OUT OF
THIS STUPID SAUSAGE CLUB!
NO OFFENCE, AUNTIE.
Auntie says, NONE TAKEN, NONE TAKEN.
Tiffany drops the Tiff-Lava on the floor.
Auntie says, THAT'S YOUR
DOUBLES PARTNER, EH?
[Upbeat music plays]
End credits roll:
“Directed by Darren Ashton.
Series Producer: Joe Weatherstone.
Executive Producers: Catherine Nebauer.
Bernadette O’Mahony.
Jan Stradling.
Cast:
Mikey: Semisi Cheekam.
Salwa: Reannah Hamdan.
Jerry: Logan Reberger.
Tiffany: Erin Choy.
Prisha: Holly Simon.
Ivanka: Ella Holowell.
Viktor: Sam Everingham.
Ms. Crapper/Blapper: Helen Dallimore
Auntie: Maria Walker.
Daddy: Daya-Tumua Sao-Mafiti.
A Northern Pictures Production.
Mikey dances.
ABC. Developed and Produced in Association with the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.
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